You’ve always been drawn to brick colonials. He loves a big yard. And the kids keep saying they want their own rooms.

It’s going to be the family home, but how do you reconcile everyone’s desires?
Experts say there are strategies to reach agreement. Here’s how to get the whole family on the same path to a new front door:

List Your Priorities
If a couple finds they’re arguing after house hunting, there’s a chance they are not presenting their actual concerns, says Dr. Kandi Walker, a communications professor at the University of Louisville.

“There’s an old adage that couples have the same argument over and over,” she says. “So, if you didn’t get the car you wanted a few years ago, you might be overreacting now, saying things like, ‘You never like what I like.’”

Start a house hunt on fresh ground by listing priorities, and then compare wishes, Walker suggests. “If you are very clear about your needs, you may find agreement easier than you think,” she says.

For instance, Walker illustrates, one partner may list a three-car garage. “It may turn out that the big garage is for a workshop – and with discussion, they find a big basement could work, too.”

Keep To A Budget
It’s also crucial to define an affordable price range, says Walker. “Realize that no matter what bracket people are in, there’s a tendency to say, ‘If we just move up a little, we could get it all.’”

For the first-time buyers that comment on TheNest.com, a Web site for newlyweds, defining an affordable housing budget often brings up a discussion of “lifestyle issues,” says Carley Roney, its executive editor. If one partner wants to travel often, for instance, they may need to agree on a home price that’s even less than what they’ll be approved for.

Decide On Decisions
Each partner may have priorities, but it’s unlikely that both will want to make every decision together, says Paul Foresman of Design Basics, an Omaha, Neb., firm that studies gender preferences.

Walker agrees. “Only one of you may actually want to look at dozens of homes. The other may say, ‘Narrow it down to five ... and then we’ll decide.’”

Share With The Kids
If kids feel any sense of control, they’ll likely adjust more easily, says Lori Collins Burgan, author of “Moving With Kids” (Harvard Common Press, 2007).

For the very young, imparting that sense can be simple. “Maybe they’ll want to know if they’ll still have their same bed or a yard,” she says. Older children will “want more input, but they’re also more likely to understand your limitations.”

If you’re relocating to a new area, involve the kids in selecting the school district. Most schools maintain websites and offer tours. Researching the right fit together helps kids feel more comfortable with their new school, a big part of their concerns with a move, Burgan concludes.